As part of the Sporting News Network, a guy using the logo “Tennessee & Random Crap,” has compiled a clever list of his 10-top cars in a very specific category.
It’s not sexiest car list, more powerful list, most expensive list, most “green” list or any list that warrants passionate attention.
Instead the list is all about a lack of passion, so to speak.
This top-10 list is a dubious, but practical list of “Top 10 cars, guaranteed to ensure your family line ends with you.”
The writer, Vol85, begins with the premise: “I was recently in Knoxville (recently being about six hours ago), and I saw a bunch of Pontiac Azteks at used car lots there. I was thinking, ‘No wonder. Who would want to ruin their life by being seen in one?’ So, the idea for this list was born.”
“ . . . These are the cars that say, ‘Nobody in the history of mankind, has had a bulge big enough to compensate for this loser-mobile.”
(Comments
in quotes are the original author’s remarks.)
10. Mazda 5 — “it's like a minivan whose mother smoked while she was pregnant. It just never grew up. It's like a dwarf minivan.”
9. Toyota Yaris Sedan — “Toyota has a knack for creating some of the wussiest cars ever.”
8. Honda Insight — “you're going to have to drive a long way to find a female who'll give you the time of day...or anything else.”
7. Plymouth Colt Vista — “If you have one of these, just kill yourself now.”
6. Chevy Lumina APV — Pretty much any minivan will end your sex-life, but the Lumina has a better-than-average ability to kill any libido.”
5. Pontiac Aztek (See above text and the corresponding image.)
4. Toyota Previa — “While minivans across-the-board, will kill any single-person's chance of an encounter with the opposite gender, the Previa will even prevent copulation with one's spouse.”
